After telling my redemption story, I wanted to share this poem a friend of mine wrote, so you can see there is hope, freedom, and life on the other side of a failed marriage. If your marriage has ended in divorce know that you too can have a redemption story, because nothing is impossible with our God.
You Are More…
My Story of Abuse and Recovery
by Leanna Green
She listens to the things he says to her everyday.
A beautiful woman now turned to gray.
Lost in his image of her, but it started long before him.
Her mother’s words engraved in her head,
She’s been branded from birth with no self worth.
Her mother always acting like she’s the one who’s wrong,
Like she’s crazy and has nothing good in her, all she is is wrong.
So is this man right, or is her mother delusional and lost within her own fight?
She believes in a Savior.
Knows that Jesus is the only one that can save her.
Goes to church every Sunday.
But she feels so trapped, doesn’t know where to turn.
Can’t run away because he holds her mind captive.
Will this ever end?
Alone in this mess, because she is too afraid to let anyone in.
She hides it well; behind her smile she has a horrifying story to tell.
He spits in her face telling her she’s worthless.
His actions make her have to pay such a high cost.
She’s so scared and lost.
Just wants to do what’s right, but she’s walking through fog with no lights on
And has no directional in sight.
So confused. Help her Lord she can’t do this on her own.
He strikes her with his words; he strikes her with his fist.
Hits her, always sorry after it’s been done.
But he never means it, because it’s the same ending everyday.
So much damage has been done.
The next day it’s right back to the same old thing…
She just falls to the floor, because she’s so tired of being missed.
Missed by the people she prayed would see.
See the pain underneath her painted on smile within her misery.
She doesn’t know what to do anymore,
Just lost and broken, shattered on the floor.
He can’t stand his own reflection, so he deflects it on her,
Making her feel as if she is the one who’s wrong.
This has been going on for so long.
She prays to God every night for direction and some insight.
She married him, so isn’t she supposed to stay?
This isn’t that black and white.
Isn’t there some other way?
She has a little girl who looks up to her now.
She doesn’t want her to grow up thinking that this is okay.
She finally gets the courage to walk away.
Sitting in her room holding her baby girl, sobbing,
Praying to God that He will be with her
And help her to continue to do what she needs to to be free
From this prison that she’s been in for so long.
Praying that God would remove his voice from her head and replace it with His.
Make him loosen his grip so her soul could be cleansed.
And find herself again.
Find her worth.
Become more than she’s ever been told.
Forgiveness she has now found.
Because in order to be free, she had to send all the hate away and just let it be.
Forgiving the man that hurt her and the mother who she could never please.
This was the only way.
She’s worth so much more than the lies she’s been told.
Her mind starts to become clear.
She finally doesn’t have to live in anymore fear.
A new voice in her head
Telling her not to listen to the awful things they have said.
Taking her hand and telling her how beautiful she is inside and out.
Her mind starts to become clear with so much less doubt.
God took her pain and used it for her good.
She put down what she thought was good and picked up what was best,
Knowing now that’s what she deserves.
Nothing but the best.
This man is unlike any other.
He saw her beauty inside and out.
Helped her erase all of the built up doubt.
With God and this man she started to understand.
They were wrong, and she was not to blame.
She is a beautiful woman that was unrightfully put to shame.
Understanding now her worth,
Nothing can stop her.
She is going to change this earth.
Her voice will resonate through the minds of
People who are still stuck where she was.
She will change their minds
And help them to no longer live in their own personal hells.
Showing them the God who saved her from hers.
Helping them see there is more than
Just living and accepting the lies they’ve been told.
With Jesus she is going to save so many souls.
I know this story all to well, because that woman I speak of is me.
And now I will help others to see.
There is a life beyond the pain.
There is a life beyond the lies you’ve been told.
Come walk with Jesus and free your soul.