1.Toys ( or anything for that matter) are not used in the manner intended.
Everything can be changed into some sort of device or weapon for the latest adventure. Even legos have a sinister side to them…”Let’s see how many times a week we can get mom to have a fit when she steps on us.”
No, the roof on the playhouse is not meant to be leapt off of onto anything…
I’m pretty sure the sled is not meant for you to surf down the slide…
You don’t even want to know some of the things that I have had to say through the years. I can’t even believe they’ve had to come out of my mouth.
Which leads to….
2. Your heart jumps into your throat at least once daily with some sort of prayer that this is not leading to a trip to the E.R.
“I was just playing around…” Yeah, most common phrase uttered.
Which is why….
3. Things in your house are either broken or well-loved-on by your boys and their friends.
There is no need to buy new furniture for many more years. Settle in my friend, because you need a crane to get out of that couch.
Cushions are for forts or shields in the battle, couches are for sitting together stacked up like a tower or a wrestling pad. (See number 1)
4. Friendship with you is not for the fainthearted. Either your friends have multiple boys and are used to the noise decibels reaching who knows what, or they love you enough to put up with it.
5. We love candles, diffusers, potpourri, or any good smelling thing….anything that dispels the smell.
The smell. Do I need to say more? I think not.
So, you then….
6. You learn to laugh at or be the queen of no reactions to gross humor.
I try to go with the no reaction thing, but being a dramatic Italian mama can make it difficult. Boys love to get a REACTION.
7. It is impossible to keep food stocked up. Food comes into the house at an alarming rate and disappears so fast your head spins.
I’ve had to resort to leaving signs on food that I may need to feed someone else and hide my chocolate in a different place each week.
8. Your response to complaints to having to do housework is “Your wife will love me for this and thank me someday. You’re welcome.”
9. Your heart will be stolen and then broken.
From the moment that beautiful baby boy is placed in your arms, your heart is given away. Every act of independence along the way is celebrated and grieved, knowing that it is your job to train them and let them go.
Which leads to….
10. You will have to trust God in ways you never imagined.
You trust that these amazing, strong-hearted and impetuous boys will hang on to the truths you have given them…listening to the instruction of their parents and following HIM all the days of their lives. (Proverbs 4)