Because of Adoption

Because it’s National Adoption Month, I sat down today hoping to write and to share about our adoption journey. I think it’s actually a very neat story filled with unexpected “angels”, the speed of time that can only be from God, and the blessing of a double gift. I try to encourage people when they are waiting for something and the waiting feels like it’s taking forever….we waited 12 years to become parents and ended up with 2 unexpected gifts. Adopting twins….with less than 30 days to prepare for their birth.

twins laughing
I started writing about all the details that led to our twins’ adoption, and then I started thinking. Though the story of how we found our boys and all the little things that happened is so important to us, what was really on my heart as I wrote about our journey is how thankful and proud I am to be a family formed through adoption.

me and the boys 001

One of the hardest things about adoption for me, is that not a day goes by that I don’t think about the boys’ birth parents. I wonder where they are and who they’ve become. It’s hard because, though I am forever grateful to them and we are connected, I sometimes wonder….will they show up at my door one day wanting our boys? A million other questions and thoughts will pass quickly through my mind, and then life goes on.  Adoption is a beautiful and deep thing.  I know that I’m their mom, but I don’t know what it’s like to carry them in my womb and give birth to them. I’ve had to let the sadness over that fact go because, quite honestly, it is what it is. Another woman carried them in her womb. It’s strange because at the same time, and as years pass, I forget that I did not give birth to them. We don’t know what those days were like for her or our babies. All we know is the moment that she and the boys’ birthfather chose us ….and all the days after that moment. Though the birth parents have chosen to have minimal contact {we never know when they will send an email and then disappear, it happens every few years}, we know that the adoption changed them, as well.

greg and boys
Adoption is a complicated thing. When I look at my boys , I see her …or him. I wonder, when they struggle or excel in an area if it is because of genetics or nurture. A combo of both, maybe? What is their health history…where are their ancestors from? When I look at my boys I also see God’s gifts to us. I believe each of our children are chosen for us, whether adopted or birthed. He chose our twins for us….and He chose us for them.

The other day, one of my boys thanked me for adopting them. He thanked me? Oh my word, dear boy, I am the one who is so very thankful. I feel so honored to be a mom through adoption.

I know that each person’s adoption journey is different. I’m not pretending that it is always roses and butterflies. My sister’s adoption journey took 3 years and included lots of complications. Adoption is an amazing, unique to each, hard to explain thing.

Because of a choice by the birth parents, we are parents. Because of adoption, I am a mom. I’m still in awe when I am called mom. Because of adoption, we are a family. A priceless gift that has changed all of us forever. Quite frankly, adoption rocks.

christmas 2011 024

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2 thoughts on “Because of Adoption

  1. karenrob

    What a blessing to know that the natural parents chose life for their boys, and that God led them to a home where they are being nurtured in faith and love!

    Like

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